Journey of a Fat Man

Was a bit disappointed this morning…

I went to weigh in this morning and found that I had not lost a single pound.  I do not know why.  I have been keeping to a 1400-1500 calorie diet over the last week and I even ran a couple days.  Perplexing.  I use Livestrong’s site to track everything I eat.  I am just confused.

Perhaps my system is in shock?  I think I am going to look into Weight Watchers.  Anybody have any thoughts on that subject?

I will keep plugging away at it.  Something has got to turn around soon.

To help me keep motivated and moving forward, I am going to schedule a 5K in the near future.  I am either going to do the September 17th 5K during the Bismarck marathon, or the 5K during the Sheyenne Valley Shuffle, on the same day.  The Sheyenne Valley Shuffle was the half marathon that I completed last year and I think I would feel like more of a failure, than I already feel, going back to that race and only doing the 5K.

I once again started the Couch to 5K program, which is a 9 week program, mostly because it worked for me last time and to start getting back in shape.  The timing would work out about right for September 17th.  I started this program today and was not in as bad of shape as I thought.  Mind you, I am very much out of shape, but not nearly as bad as when I started the program last time.  And I plan on pushing it more this time.

I am really looking forward to this race.  Anybody else?

It was worse than I thought.  I was actually a bit anxious to step on the scale this morning.  I feel like I am starting over, rather than picking up where I left off those 10 months ago.  Has it been 10 months already?

So, what do we call this?  How about Weigh-In 2.1?  A new version of me I reckon.

Let us get started.

Weigh-In 2.1:

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I knew that I had gained weight, but I did not realize it was 50 pounds.  How quickly weight can get away from someone.  It is a little depressing, but not a show stopper.

I had a good start last week.  Hit the treadmill and walked 2.5 miles on Wednesday and did 1.5 miles Thursday where I half walked, half jogged.  Through the weekend I kept pretty active and I forgot how good it felt to get moving again.

Time for a new start.

I want to start off by apologizing to everybody for my absence as of late.  I have been through quite a few things these past few months, including two moves and two job changes.  I am now working for a farmer/rancher in Wibaux, Montana and am loving it.  It is really nice getting to use my hands for manual labor rather than typing on a keyboard.   I do not currently have internet connectivity…..except when I go to visit relatives, so it may be a while in between posts.  Please bear with me.’

The Shuffle…

September 18, 2010
Baldhill Dam about 10 miles north of Valley City, ND.

It was a brisk morning…and when I say brisk I am being kind.  It was 38 degrees in the sun when we all lined up on the face of the dam for the start of the race.  I was trying to clear my head and attempting to focus on the task that I had laid before myself.  To finish a half marathon.  I had trained for months for this event, but when it came to race day, I was unsure if I had prepared enough.

As I was warming up before the race I was unsure as to what I should wear….should I keep on my sweat pants?  Should I dawn my sweatshirt?  Thirty Eight degrees is pretty damn cold.  I decided against the sweatshirt but for the pants.

At precisely 9am the gun went off.  When I started the race I had no misconceptions that I was going to win.  All I wanted to do was finish and enjoy my own race.  I knew there were water stations scheduled for 3, 6, 9 and 11 mile marks…approximately.  And I had planned stopping at each one even for a few seconds.

It had taken me 3 miles, to the first water station, to warm up.  At which point, I had removed my sweatpants and greatly accepted a cup or two of water.  I stayed there maybe a minute before moving on.

As I was progressing I had noticed everybody pulling farther and farther ahead, but it did not discourage me in the least.  I was running my own race and did not care what everybody else was doing.  I wanted to enjoy the moment and push myself.

I then reached mile marker 6…the next water station.  I took advantage of the privy, some water and a banana.  While I was there I apologized profusely to the deputy sheriff that had been following me….in last place….for holding him up.  He just followed along without any worries.

I was timing myself throughout the course on my own stop watch and once I passed the 6.2 mile mark, I was ahead of my 10k (Prairie Rose State Game) time by about 5 minutes.  Which helped to boost me along.

At the 9 mile mark is where things started to go south.  My hamstrings started to cramp.  I pushed through it, because at this point I started to enter the Valley City, city limits.  I knew that things were downhill from here.

Once I got into town I was being escorted by a police officer out front and the deputy behind.  I then progressed to Chautauqua park.  The course rounded the park then continued to move through the city.  After the park I headed towards the hospital, then across the river to the 11 mile mark.  At this point the cramping had moved to my quads.

When I got to the 11 mile aid station, which I must say the volunteers they had for this race had just been outstanding to this point…standing in the cold, plus waiting for my slow pace.  As I approached the 11 mile aid station I mentioned, “Have you seen a bunch of people run past here recently?  I have been trying to catch them all morning.”  My attempt at levity had brought a few chuckles.  Even though I was in extreme pain, I pressed on after a short break.

On a side note….at the 10 mile mark I had beaten my previous (two weeks prior) personal 10 mile record by about 7 minutes.  After which, the last 5k seemed to go worse than ever.

After the 11 mile aid station I pressed on.  Knowing at this point that if I would stop I would not be able to go any farther.  I chugged along past the Eagles club to main street, where another policed cruiser as well as a cordoned off area was awaiting me.  I knew I was last..by approximately 30 minutes or so, but still I did not care.  My goal was to finish…and that I would!

I pressed along down main street…a police cruiser ahead of me and a deputy behind me…both with lights flashing.  I felt like a person carrying an Olympic torch…..minus the torch.

I ran West down main until I hit Central avenue, where I had to head South.  I had lived in Valley City for several years, so I knew this neighborhood well.  I took Central all the way down to the rec center where I again headed west.  As I passed the rec center I passed the 13 mile mark.  Knowing the race was 13.1 miles, I figured I was in the home stretch….the only problem was that I could see 3 blocks ahead and had yet seen the finish line.  My legs were failing….I had been cramping for some time with no relief in sight.

I ran the next 3 blocks or so before the trail went into the city park.  At this point, which to me had seemed a mile too far already, I could see the finish line.  Just on the other side of the park.  At this point I kicked in the afterburners and pressed forward.  Step by grueling step I crossed the finish line at 3 hrs 15 minutes.

Once I stopped forward movement my legs seized and did not want to move another step.  I felt like I wanted to collapse,   but I managed to stay upright to the cheers of the volunteers present.

I finished!!

270

Wow!  Has it almost been an entire month since I had last posted?  I do apologize to those of you that have been with me during this entire Journey, as well as those of you that are discovering me for the first time.

Well, in 18 short days…I still cannot believe that it is that close already…I have the Sheyenne Valley Shuffle half marathon.  I do not feel ready, so I am going to have to bust my hump for the next two weeks to make sure I am as close as I can be.  But, one thing in my favor, even though I have not been running as much the last couple months, I did do 10 miles last Thursday!  I steadily progressed up to it, increasing a couple miles every other week.  It still took me 2½ hours to do the 10 miles.  Is that good?  I did not care what my final time would be.  If I had to run, walk or crawl I was going to finish it.  I am still looking forward to the half marathon, but does it have to be so soon?

I have been a bad boy this summer.  My mind has not really been on the most important thing, my health.  I have went through a lot of changes over the past couple months.  Started a new job, moved to a completely different town (away from my daughter L) and I am going through a divorce.  Any one or all of these could be the reason, or it can be something completely different.  I really do not know, but I have not been watching what I am shoveling into my mouth and I have not been exercising like I should.  The good side, if there is a good side, is that I have only gained five pounds.  The bad side is that mentally I feel like I have pushed myself back a year.  I have lacked all motivation, or even the will to even care.

I do not mean to sound like I am whining, but it is the honest truth.  I just do not seem care.  How do I get out of this funk?  How do I move on?  This Journey of mine seems to be stuck in a perpetual rest stop alongside the road. I need my focus back.  Perhaps a swift kick in the ass would do it?  I think one of my biggest problems is being content with my life as it stands.  Deal with whatever life throws at me and move on.

Friday.  This Friday I shall start my Journey anew.  New goals.  Renewed motivations.  Renewed determination.  I will go back to keeping track of every calorie consumed.  I will exercise with more vigor than I have done to date.  Do you remember the quote from the movie “The Shawshank Redemption” that I published at the start of my Journey back in May 2009?  “Get busy living, or get busy dying!”  Well, I am through feeling sorry for myself.  And I am not quite done with this life of mine yet.  Hell, not by a long shot!

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I seemed to stay consistent at least over this past couple weeks.  Now it is time to get back to work.  Only a month and a half until the half marathon, which feels like it is not enough time, seeing that I will only have 4 or 5 weeks to get my running back to where it was.  I have not doubts that I can do it, but it is going to be a lot of work.

Last week I went out for a nice 3.09 mile walk, and then the next day went on a 2.32 mile run.  Today I went to the track to recalibrate my Nike+ device, and spent a couple miles doing that.  Tomorrow…..I am planning on doing 8 miles.  Rain or shine.

The past couple weeks have been hard.  Like I mentioned in my previous post.  My biggest problem is with my schedule.  I work Saturday – Monday 5:30am – 4 to 4:30pm.  By the time I am done with work I am beat and have not will to do anything.  Plus, with the heat and humidity lately, it is not pleasant.  I have to rework my running rotation so my long days work out on a Thursday.  I am attempting to get back on track…it would just work a lot better if I had a treadmill.  I will have to keep my eyes open for a deal on one.

I shall keep pressing on the best that I can.  I have to get back to my new self.  Thank you one and all for staying with me on this Journey for my life.  I appreciate each and every one of you.

I never did post a pic of the Prairie Rose State Games.  Here is one of My Brother Michael (center), Mac (right) and I (left).

Over the past couple weeks I felt that I have lost my focus, motivation, ambition, whatever you want to call it.  I do not know the cause.  It could be the fact that I have been working 10-12 hour days and when I get home I am too damn tired to hit the road, or the process of setting up a new home.  In either case, I need to give myself a swift kick in the backside and get moving again.  I have only taken the opportunity to run once in the past couple weeks (4 miles).  Plus, I have been eating food that I know I should not.  I will get back in the saddle, I have to…no if’s and’s or but’s about it.  

So, please stick with me.  I have not quit, just a short hiatus of sorts.  I need to rework my run schedule seeing that I work Friday through Monday now.  Re-focus my efforts to those things that are most important.  Staying healthy!